PFFT

Pfft – Yes, apparently, it’s a real word.

Can you believe this word is actually in the dictionary?

Pfft.

Yes. Seriously.

That tiny puff of air you make when someone says something ridiculous, when a brilliant plan crashes and burns, or when you’re trying desperately not to laugh has somehow managed to become an officially recognised word.

Frankly, if pfft can make it into the dictionary, there’s hope for all of us.

Technically, pfft is an informal interjection and a form of onomatopoeia. Onomatopoeia is the very impressive name given to words that sound like the noise they describe — things like bang, buzz, hiss and splash.

And then there’s pfft.

The slightly less glamorous cousin.

The ultimate ‘Yeah, right.’

Most commonly, pfft is used to express disbelief, dismissal or complete lack of enthusiasm.

Someone says, ‘I’m definitely going to the gym every morning before work.’

Pfft.

Someone claims, ‘I only had one glass of wine.’

Pfft.

Someone says, ‘I’ll just pop into Kmart for one thing.’

Pfft. Please.

It’s also wonderfully efficient. Why waste precious energy constructing a thoughtful response when one tiny burst of air can say, ‘That’s ridiculous, I don’t believe you, and I’ve already lost interest?’ It’s basically emotional shorthand for people who can’t be bothered forming an entire sentence.

It is essentially the sound effect version of ‘yeah, right’, ‘whatever’ or ‘I’m not buying a single word of that.’

For maximum impact, it should ideally be accompanied by a raised eyebrow or a subtle eye roll.

Pfft can also be the noise that escapes when you’re desperately trying not to laugh. It’s the laugh you weren’t supposed to let out.

You know the situation.

Someone says something accidentally hilarious during a completely inappropriate moment. You clamp your lips together, stare at the floor and attempt to behave like a mature adult.

Then…

Pfft.

Game over.

Now everyone knows you were laughing.

And then… Pfft… Gone.

Pfft can also describe something disappearing or ending suddenly.

‘He was standing there one second and—pfft—he was gone.’

It works equally well for plans, projects, diets, New Year’s resolutions and other things that begin with enormous enthusiasm and quietly disappear three days later.

‘We were going to renovate the entire house ourselves. Then the idea went pfft.’

Probably for the best.

Pfft is surprisingly versatile for five letters. In writing, pfft can also be a muffled pop, a quick burst of air, something whizzing past or a small fizzling sound.

So technically, it’s doing quite a lot for a word that looks like someone fell asleep on the keyboard.

Pfft responsibly – a small warning – pfft is very informal.

In texts, casual conversation, social media or funny writing? Perfect.

In response to your boss explaining the new company policy? Perhaps not.

Because depending on the tone, pfft can come across as sarcastic, dismissive or downright rude.

Which is actually rather impressive.

Five letters.

No vowels.

And with the right facial expression, somehow capable of communicating an entire attitude.

Who needs words?

Oh, wait.

Apparently pfft is one.